Tuesday, May 5, 2009

My husband, my child?

Last week at church this subject came up again. A friend of mine came over to our family and counted my children and then counted Jeremy. I corrected her by saying "no, we only have four". She was shocked and told me that I am the only one who has not counted their husband as an extra child. I responded by saying "he can scrub floors and helps out a lot, I gotta give credit where it is due". But it goes beyond that. This is not the first time that people have said that, and I know people that count their husbands in that count. Not to say that I have never felt that way, years ago if you would have asked me I probably would have completely agreed. But as a couple and as two human beings we have grown in our maturity and in our faith and today, in our marriage and faith, that just isn't the case. Beyond the obvious perks to having him as my husband and partner, he is my comforter, an awesome daddy, role model, my prayer partner, church usher, my lawn mower, my muscles, my chore sharer, our HARD WORKER (ie an amazing bricklayer, patio putter-in-er, stone mason, landscaper), and I could go on and on. Sure, as sinful human beings there are days and times that we both act childish but never once has he called me a child and I don't plan to do it to him. (It also does not mean that we don't make our kids do chores, but you all know there is a difference.)
Next week marks our first date TEN years ago (he was my 21st birthday present) and the following week marks our EIGHT year wedding anniversary. I am proud to say that I am his, he is mine and we are His.
Now I know that these people mean no harm when they say this. But it gets me thinking that if we all just had another notch of respect for our husbands there would be fewer issues and a lot less splits in our society. Am I off the deep end or does that make sense?
There was a post I was directed to a couple of months ago and I saved it in my favorites so that I can reference it when I feel I need to. It is titled 12 Things You Should Not Do to Your Husband by:Camilia Brown. Here is number one of the twelve.
DO NOT treat your husband as one of your children. You are not running the household he is. So no matter how busy you think you are or how many tasks you might have to perform at once you should not address your husband in this way: “Honey come here! Do this! Hold that! Grab this! Deal with this or that!” Now I am all for asking our husbands for help when he is available to give it, but bossing him around is not becoming to a wife. We must conduct ourselves as his help meet and not treat him as if the reverse were true.

So, now to my back. I am feeling much better. Cleared to do what I can but not over do it. I am still waiting to be allowed to ride my bike and get back to the gym. I have gone from three times a day at the chiro, to two, and now to three times a week! Pretty awesome if I do say so myself. I am working on my review of the laundry products (hey, I wanna get it just right), and also an awesome giveaway (yeah! It will be my first ever).

Happy day.

2 comments:

Christy O said...

Awesome post! You go girl! I agree, if we accorded some respect with our words and thoughts, there would be a lot fewer problems.

Kari said...

I have to admit, I fall into that alot. I will try to do better. Assignment #2.

Still trying to remember to breathe,
Kari